How To Feel Beautiful
Ever had this dream before?
"You're the most beautiful and likeable person. Everyone around you, be it gentleman or ladies, they love you."
Then you woke up and walked to your bathroom, looked at the mirror with your heavy eyes and what you saw isn't that super attractive person in your dream.
That's sucks. Life sucks.
Yes, I used to feel this way.
As someone disqualified by the society's beauty standard (and the culture where I grew up), I used to feel I'm ugly and unattractive. Square jaw line, high cheekbones, upturned nose, round and chubby......you name it, I have it. That's how insecure I was.
So, what have I done to have such confidence of putting my big selfie as the post's cover photo?
Here's my secrets.
Simple and down-to-earth.
Secret #1 : Stop judging yourself based on your beauty standard.
Hah —— did you noticed I said "Your Beauty Standard", not "Society Beauty Standard".
We have to admit to ourselves. We all have our own beauty standard. They are accumulated since our childhood and influenced by cultures and medias along the way. The reason you don't feel beautiful is because your appearance doesn't meet your own standard.
So, how can I feel more beautiful?
Secret #2 : Study your face and your body thru the artist's eyes.
Wash your face.
Drink a big glass of water.
Sit in front of a mirror. Or take a selfie.
Clear your mind and kick away your judgmental.
Get a closer look of yourself, from forehead, along your eyes, nose, cheeks to your lips, chin and neck. Take notice on the curves and contours, they show you the rhythm of your face.
What does it sound?
Not listen with your ears but with your heart (mind). Feel it.
OK, this maybe a little too abstract. But try it! There's no harm to do so (privately).
This is my way to learn my beauty thru fresh eyes. I started modeling for my painting reference photo since a year ago. I've no idea it could be a way of claiming my self-confidence but it did.
When painting my self-portrait, I'd to look forth and back between my canvas and the photo. It allowed me to observe every inch of me and that's when I slowly discovering the beauty in me.
In other words,
By learning your beauty and accepting your appearance, you'll regained your confidence. That's how I feel beautiful most of the time. (Yeah, that critical perfectionist me still creep on me from time to time.)
And the best thing is, I received compliments from people around, some are even strangers. They just validated my concept! If you feel beautiful, people see your beauty.
Your beauty is the reflection of your mind.
Don't believe me? Try it yourself. It's even better if you try to draw yourself from mirror or photo.
And below is my latest drawing from my selfie, together with my whole drawing process. The blue peony with ribbons, the white background and the graphite drawing are mimicking the elegant Qin-Hua-Ci, Chinese Blue & White Pottery. It means beauty, high quality and rare. That's how I feel about myself — ahem...
Thank you so much for reading and watching.
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